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| Ok, Now I've Gone To Long!; poem.this is the final topic for mine!!! | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 18 2005, 02:43 PM (220 Views) | |
| Ida | May 18 2005, 02:43 PM Post #1 |
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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okay now, I'm going to make more topic just for one poem this is the final topic for mine! a new poem: The emptiness, it’s self One day, I’ll walk alone, None on the right, None on the left, None in the front, None behind, Just me and, no one If it rain, I have no one, Just me, the rain and, None, And then It will rain on me, Just me But then maybe will the sun come, just maybe, and if it does, I’ll still be alone. None to share it whit. Just me and, no one. Maybe I’ll end up whit, Nothing? no one? Should I be glad for that? Or? I just really don’t know. But I can’t think on that, Not now, Maybe tomorrow? Maybe I wont have time? I just, don’t know. I don't know if it really can be called a poem...I DUNNO!!! more is coming soon.... |
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| Sora | May 19 2005, 12:21 AM Post #2 |
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Nice poem, but perhaps you should come up with a topic for all of them so you don't have to keep creating more. That way, we can find all of your poems in one spot. |
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| Ida | May 19 2005, 07:34 PM Post #3 |
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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weird me...thought I wrote I was going to o.O well I am! soon I'll have more...I hope I will... |
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| Mio | May 21 2005, 06:59 AM Post #4 |
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Everyone changes...
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i like it but i think it would be better as a song ^^ the chorus bit would probly be the bit about rain..XD |
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| Ida | May 21 2005, 08:34 AM Post #5 |
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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song? tha! you can make it to one! I think it may be alittle short...funny... but if someone whant then they can make a song out of it...but then I wanna hear it!
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| Mio | May 22 2005, 03:40 AM Post #6 |
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Everyone changes...
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i've recorded the first verse and the chorus so far...its just me singing, no backing track. I made afew little changes to the words so that it sounded better ^^ Click Here to Hear It! |
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| Ida | May 22 2005, 08:30 AM Post #7 |
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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omg. you did it! I can't believe you did it! omg. It sounded great! thank you! |
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| Mio | May 22 2005, 08:36 AM Post #8 |
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Everyone changes...
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your welcome maxi...can i call you maxi? its no trouble, i'll be posting the next verse soon ^^ |
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| Ida | May 22 2005, 08:52 AM Post #9 |
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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sure you can call me Maxi! and thanks! I'll love to hear next verse to! maybe one time, you can get some music effects in it! |
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| Mio | May 22 2005, 03:19 PM Post #10 |
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Everyone changes...
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yeah...good idea, i think i will! |
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| Ida | Jun 17 2005, 06:10 PM Post #11 |
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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^^ hewo! I have a new poem! although...I'm not sure it's a poem, more a short song...cause I took something twice... Can’t take it You stod there before, Arrgh I don’t think I can take this much more! Now you’re dead, It still goes around in my head! I can see you disappear, It was then. Arrgh! I still see it agene and agene! You didn’t look, No, you didn’t see. It’s, like, fire in the ocean, Like, Right into my head, Like, Light are blending me. I saw it then and there. I had nothing to say, It was when you said ‘hey!’ It came so fast, Like the speed of a fireblast. It’s all in my mind. I did it on my own, In light you fall down. Hopeless I look’t at you, Finding myself forward you. Now, I’m the bad, the sad, hopeless. You didn’t look, No, you didn’t see. It’s, like, fire in the ocean, Like, Right into my head, Like, Light are blending me. I saw it then and there. what you think? was the first one better? |
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| +Bloodmyer+ | Jun 17 2005, 06:16 PM Post #12 |
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-:|sHe iS mY sIn|:-
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Wow, that's realy good Maxi,10/10 wow, i love to hearmore!!!!!^^ maby i could show ya some of my poem's one day!!! |
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| Ida | Jun 17 2005, 06:22 PM Post #13 |
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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you have poems? ahhh! KEWL! Me read one time! oh...thanki for the rating! |
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| +Bloodmyer+ | Jun 17 2005, 06:28 PM Post #14 |
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-:|sHe iS mY sIn|:-
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No problem,me like complimenting my freind's!!!
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| Metatron | Jun 17 2005, 07:35 PM Post #15 |
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|| Wayward Victorian ||
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Those are really good Maxi!!^^ I give the same rating as Sam: 10/10!! That's some really good stuff, again I say!!^^ |
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2:40 PM Jul 11