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Ok, Now I've Gone To Long!; poem.this is the final topic for mine!!!
Topic Started: May 18 2005, 02:43 PM (222 Views)
Ida
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We don't claim to be perfect, but we're free
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okay now, I'm going to make more topic just for one poem this is the final topic for mine!

a new poem:

The emptiness, it’s self

One day,
I’ll walk alone,
None on the right,
None on the left,
None in the front,
None behind,
Just me and, no one

If it rain,
I have no one,
Just me, the rain and,
None,
And then
It will rain on me,
Just me

But then maybe
will the sun come,
just maybe,
and if it does,
I’ll still be alone.
None to share it whit.
Just me and, no one.

Maybe I’ll end up whit,
Nothing?
no one?
Should I be glad for that?
Or?
I just really don’t know.
But I can’t think on that,
Not now,
Maybe tomorrow?
Maybe I wont have time?
I just, don’t know.



I don't know if it really can be called a poem...I DUNNO!!!

more is coming soon....
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Sora

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Nice poem, but perhaps you should come up with a topic for all of them so you don't have to keep creating more. That way, we can find all of your poems in one spot.
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Ida
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weird me...thought I wrote I was going to o.O

well I am! soon I'll have more...I hope I will...
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Mio
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i like it but i think it would be better as a song ^^

the chorus bit would probly be the bit about rain..XD
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Ida
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song? tha! you can make it to one! I think it may be alittle short...funny...

but if someone whant then they can make a song out of it...but then I wanna hear it! :P
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Mio
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i've recorded the first verse and the chorus so far...its just me singing, no backing track.
I made afew little changes to the words so that it sounded better ^^

Click Here to Hear It!
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Ida
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omg. you did it! I can't believe you did it! omg. It sounded great! thank you!
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Mio
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your welcome maxi...can i call you maxi?
its no trouble, i'll be posting the next verse soon ^^
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Ida
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sure you can call me Maxi!

and thanks! I'll love to hear next verse to! maybe one time, you can get some music effects in it!
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Mio
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yeah...good idea, i think i will!
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Ida
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^^

hewo! I have a new poem! although...I'm not sure it's a poem, more a short song...cause I took something twice...



Can’t take it

You stod there before,
Arrgh
I don’t think I can take this much more!
Now you’re dead,
It still goes around in my head!
I can see you disappear,
It was then.
Arrgh!
I still see it agene and agene!

You didn’t look,
No, you didn’t see.

It’s, like, fire in the ocean,
Like, Right into my head,
Like, Light are blending me.
I saw it then and there.

I had nothing to say,
It was when you said ‘hey!’
It came so fast,
Like the speed of a fireblast.
It’s all in my mind.

I did it on my own,
In light you fall down.
Hopeless I look’t at you,
Finding myself forward you.
Now,
I’m the bad, the sad, hopeless.

You didn’t look,
No, you didn’t see.

It’s, like, fire in the ocean,
Like, Right into my head,
Like, Light are blending me.
I saw it then and there.

what you think? was the first one better?
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+Bloodmyer+
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Wow, that's realy good Maxi,10/10 wow, i love to hearmore!!!!!^^ maby i could show ya some of my poem's one day!!!
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Ida
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you have poems? ahhh! KEWL! Me read one time! oh...thanki for the rating!
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+Bloodmyer+
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No problem,me like complimenting my freind's!!! :hug:
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Metatron
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Those are really good Maxi!!^^ I give the same rating as Sam: 10/10!! That's some really good stuff, again I say!!^^
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