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Ein's Pen At Work; a series of short stories
Topic Started: Oct 27 2004, 03:11 PM (127 Views)
Sieg Wahrheit
Unregistered

I don't make fanfictions at all except Chaos Legion -Rave Master (Note: it is a yaoi fanfic)

I am more focused on what I see in reality. The things around me, my experiences and the things that my friends tell me, I make them into my own stories. I don't make stories that can harm any person because I believe that stories are made to be harmless and is not to hurt anybody.

Although all of my works (except Chaos-Rave) may look boring by the intro, I suggest you read it entirely before hitting the + Add Reply button. Don't worry, it's very short. It wont take you more than 3 minutes to read it.

These are series of short stories made by me.
I tend to make romance, horror, comedy and occassion-based (example: A story that happened in one X-mas evening...)

Heart - romance
Green emoticon - horror
Comedy - question mark
Smiley - Occasion-based
Lol - whatever story

This one is a love story.
I just use the names that suddenly popped out of my mind. I can't think of better ones.

***

This is a story about lovers named Melissa and Raphael.

The two isn’t normal. Raphael is blind since childhood and Melissa has a heart disease by birth.

Raphael is a kind and handsome man. He was blind not to see the evil in the world. All what Raphael can see was darkness throughout his life but not the darkness of evil but darkness of purity from within.

Melissa who has a sick heart however has a kind heart. She is also beautiful. She has a long blond hair with a little curly style. Has lovely green eyes and a fair skin. Even if the beating of her heart is bad, Melissa’s heart beats for all human beings and all things in the universe. She gives them smile and respect.

Melissa told herself.
“Soon, I will be gone from this world but at least… in my entire life I filled it with endless smiles and not with pain.”
Then Melissa smiled.

No matter how it seems impossible, Raphael longs to see how beautiful Melissa was but his defect is stopping him to do so. But he was thankful that he can touch her to feel that she is by his side.

Raphael and Melissa did not take deficiency as a hindrance for love.

“For love is blind but sweeter than chocolate”

However, on the April fool’s day, Melissa was sent to the hospital

fateful day of April 25, 2020… <why do I love this date?> Melissa died of heart failure. Raphael’s mind and heart was almost killed by the incident. However, the nurse gave a letter to Raphael written by Melissa a week before her supposed death. Raphael asked the nurse to read it for him The nurse reads clearly…

“Dear Raphael,

Forgive me, I am very sorry that I have to say good-bye. I will go meet him, the greatest one of all beings in the universe. But, Raphael, all you longed for in your life is to see things. As a final gift, I would want to give you my eyes. I want you to see the things I saw when I was still alive. I also have my picture here so you can see what I look like finally. Raphael, I may not be here in this world anymore but I wish you will never ever forget me

Melissa
April 18, 2020”

Raphael and the nurse was moved by the letter.

The following month, May 2020… Raphael’s operation for his eyesight has been initiated. The doctors said it’s almost impossible but it is a miracle that Raphael is now able to see with the eyes of his late lover.

The first thing Raphael saw was the picture of Melissa. His tears filled the picture.

A day after the operation,
Raphael went to the cemetery where Melissa was laid to her rest. He offered a white candle and blood red roses for Melissa. He kissed the cold slab of his beloved and went to say good-bye.

No matter how much Raphael wants to cry, the eyes of Melissa are forcing him to smile. He is so much confused with what is happening so Raphael went to a psychic.

The psychic said
“The eyes contains the gift of smile to whoever it will be passed on. The person who previously owns it is a cheerful person who smiles in no matter pain she is feeling. She did not mind pain at all”

Raphael thought that he might disgrace Melissa if he cried for her death so he just smiled. He feels that he and Melissa are one.

Raphael begins to see the world, the world where Melissa lived happily. Filled with green grasses, lovely flowers, blue seas and heavenly skies.

After a year, Raphael decided to enter the seminary to be a priest.
There, he met a young 32-year-old nun named Sister Marie.

Five years has gone on fast. Raphael is already half of his total human reformation and after 5 more years he will be a priest. He has totally forgotten Melissa already. He has never visited Melissa’s grave for five years.

April 20, 2025…

However, Raphael feels anxious. There is something missing in his heart in all those years. Sister Margarette asked Raphael “Those eyes are as green as the humble earth. However, are those eyes really yours?”

Raphael was moved by Sister Margarette’s question. He forgot about Melissa already. Raphael cannot forgive himself for the oblivion he did to Melissa.

He begged the head priest to offer a mass for Melissa in the 25th of April. The head priest fulfilled his request on the said date.

Then Raphael knelt down and prayed to God.
“Lord, please take care of Melissa”

After 5 more years, Raphael was ordained as a Priest. Brother Raphael’s first task was to celebrate the mass for two lovers.

Lisa and Raffy.
Raffy has a poor heart and Lisa on the other hand is blind.
Raphael remembers Melissa on the said wedding and with all his heart, he gave all his best for his first mass.

Sister Margarette smiled at Brother Raphael. “God bless you”

Right after the wedding, the young priest went to Melissa’s tomb and placed a black rosary by the cross.

Melissa, thank you. You gave me a second life that I never expected. You may be gone visibly on earth but in my heart, even my death can never erase you.

The end.

***
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Driger_5
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I was wondering, is English your native language? No offence, it was a good story but the style seems... well, like you have trouble with some grammer, but again, no offence, it's quite a good story.
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Kutoria
^Laughs with Shinneth.
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Even though you have a few grammer problems, I really liked this story! I think it's the best of all bestest (whoa that sounds corny) Anyway, I like it because it's different. Lately stories are just humor. But still, I like it!
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Driger_5
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mmm, i agree, it's a really good story...
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Sieg Wahrheit
Unregistered

Driger_5,Oct 28 2004
03:09 AM
I was wondering, is English your native language? No offence, it was a good story but the style seems... well, like you have trouble with some grammer, but again, no offence, it's quite a good story.

I am a Dutch Boy (Sounds like a brand of paint or something :sweatdrop:, neh, Moebius?), my friend. Sorry for the grammar problem. Thanks you two.

Second Story: The challenge at the crypt.

There are five friends namely Sherwin, Charlie, Christian, Ian and Marco.
They have one thing in common. They love anime, they love to have fun and they love to try out challenges. Everyone is common to each other except Christian who does not have that much of a vivid imagination. His other four friends are imaginative and creative.

Their repetitive life that watches anime, sit in front of the TV all day, call in the telephone, play the PC or any console and breaking each other’s record. It continues until one night… October 30… Ian decided to ask his friends if they would like to take the challenge.

Ian challenged them that “Let’s go to the “Ye olde Crypton cemetery” for this challenge!” Charlie immediately disagreed that “Why the heck should we go there? What challenge, dude?” Ian continued “Ahem, let me finish. The challenge is simple. Anyone who can sleep in the middle of that cemetery gets $1000.00 from the losers” Sherwin nodded “Hey! That’s one big cash, dude but I doubt someone will be able to make it! Hey, Nice idea anyways.” Marco seconded Sherwin’s opinion and said “It is truly a heart-pumping challenge but the idea is so unique!” Everyone has spoken their thoughts except for Christian who is just listening to them. The four asked what Christian thinks and Christian just replied “I have nothing to say but I accept the challenge” The four laughed “We’ll see!” Christian closed his eyes and slept. The four continued to exchange ghost stories and some comedy stories to each other and their imagination grew wider.

October 31… The four did their best not to find a costume for Halloween but to prepare for the challenge. Christian just slept the whole day after he packed something to eat because Christian thinks that he needs to sleep in order to have enough energy for the challenge.

Now the day came, November 1st.
In the morning, The five boarded a bus that can send them directly to the “Ye olde Crypton”
The four immediately located the middle of the cemetery. Christian just sat down in the ground listened to them.

It is late afternoon when they are able to locate the middle of the cemetery. All of them built a tent to sleep on except Christian who just sat on the ground eating pork and beans.

The night begins to bite the sky. The three decided to go home except Ian and Christian. Ian bids those “cowards” a good-bye.

The three on their way back started kicking the krypts and slabs. “They’re dead so maybe they can be good kicking targets!” The three laughed.

After 30 minutes, they heard the three boys shout “Help us!!!” Ian rushed towards the three to help them. Christian just stayed where he is to continue the challenge.

By 10:00 Midnight, Christian is alone at the middle of the cemetery. He cannot imagine what happened to the other four but one thing is for sure, he will finish the challenge and end up as a winner.

Suddenly, things become freaky when a haze surrounded Christian. Christian gave a smirk and said “It’s just an old man smoking.” The haze becomes clear creating a scary image of a corpse. It said in a groaning voice “Christian… gooo home! Run awaaaay before I turn you into a meeeal!”

Christian thinks that the ghost is hungry not scary so he offered the ghost a can of pork and beans and a hamburger. “Are you hungry, sir? Better eat or you wont be a happy ghost at all” Although what he did sound stupid, Christian made the old ghost happy. The haze vanished and Christian was left alone again.

A few minutes after the haze comes a pack of wolves barking at Christian. Christian was taken a back when the wolves started tearing his shirt. Christian opened his bag and offered the wolves some steak and beef patties. The wolves were tamed like dogs in a dog show bowing down to Christian.

Christian fell a sleep after an hour. It’s already 11:30 Midnight on his watch.
The dogs err… wolves are snoring loud too.

By 12:00 midnight, Christian placed a flag where he has sat down on and offered flowers for the dead. The wolves just watched him. Then he placed some candles to light up the place. The place is now bright not dark and lesser-scary.

By 2:30 AM, Christian bid the wolves good-bye because he feels accomplished. The wolves felt so sad that such a good man is leaving the cemetery.

A half way to the exit, Christian begins to get lost.
He prayed that it may not be his last day.
Surprisingly, that same haze last night appeared before him.
It’s the old ghost! The ghost in return showed Christian the exit. Christian thanked the ghost and walked home.

Upon reaching his house, he saw the funeral parlor without vacancy. All the four small chapels are filled with mourning people and four teenage-size coffins are in front. Christian dropped his bag and runs towards a priest who was sitting outside the funeral parlor.

“Father, who are those four in this wake?” He asked. The priest answered, “They are found in a cemetery eaten by darkness and was tore by a pack of wolves.” Christian remembers his friends who abandoned him at the middle of the night. Christian asked the names. The priest answered “Ian Parker, Marco Wayne, Sherwin Milton and Charlie Alphs” Christian fainted when he heard that his friends died after all. The priest smiled that Christian is lucky that he survived the cemetery. “Maybe because this young man is friendly to the dead” Then the priest called for an ambulance. The hospital then called Christian’s family.

It is only on the midnight of November 3 that Christian regained consciousness. He woke up right after he felt a haze. The haze is wider than that of the old ghost. Then the haze materialized into four young men of Christian’s age handing out the money to Christian and then they groaned “Congratulations, dude… now we are going to have a trip in the next world” Christian smiled and challenged the ghost “Whoever comes to life first will receive triple the amount” the haze vanished and Christian just laughed.

“The dead being risen?” Then he prays for the soul of the four.
That very day on November 10, Christian attended the burial rites for his four friends. Impossible it may seem (this is only a story though) Ian woke up from his almost death sleep. Ian’s body is filled with stitches because of the wolves bite and said “Christian, where is meh $3k cash prize?” All the people ran away being frightened except him. Christian freaked out and handed the $3000.00 to Ian’s corpse. Ian’s corpse collapsed right after obtaining the money. Christian feels Ian’s heartbeat if he’s still alive but there is no response.

“He’s dead.” He said. Then Christian walked home to eat his lunch.

In the middle of the cemetery where Christian’s flag stands, the four ghosts guards the flag in memory of their friend who is still struggling to live.

Christian ends the day saying…
“I will never dare to challenge the dead again”

A haze tucks Christian in a blanket to protect him from the cold and then the haze vanished. So as the story concluded.

- The End.

*goes to think of new story*
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Sarutobi Sasuke
Leader
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Einberg, I have read your profile and you are going to be a good novelist in the nearest future possible. Although Mr. Paint err... Dutch Boy :sweatdrop: has some grammar problems, I can help you fix it at Y!IM.

Your two original stories are to be rated at my review.

First Story = 4/5
It is romantic. It made me cry when I read it. The story simply is inspiring for lovers with critical condition. The story somewhow reminds me of the Korean Soap Opera called "Love Letter" that my mom watches + the horror movie of "The Eye"

Second Story = 4.5/5
This story is a excellent Halloween eye and mind candy. It shows the true color of Halloween by the Celts and is very realistic (though it contains some almost-impossible parts). It shows an extra-ordinary courage of a teenage boy and tells that some unimaginative people can withstand any fear that comes to their way.

I learned so many lessons from your two short stories. Even if they are short and somewhat boring to others, we must not forget that stories are written to teach the reader a valuable lesson not just for the reader to have fun reading it.

Sieg Wahrheit
Story Rating (total) 8.5/10
Author Rating: 8/10

All I can say is, write more and continue to teach us moral lessons from your stories. Also, please fix your grammar problem.

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Sieg Wahrheit
Unregistered

Sorry, Moebius. I haven't heard of such shows except Sieg Hart who told me about Love Letter (the man-in-distress that decided to priesthood)
Unfortunately, it's my original. I did not copy them from everywhere else.

I know those stories gave Ty Kamarians a negative mood of scared and sad. I will write a comedy story next time to make up for it.
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Sarutobi Sasuke
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Hehehe, you changed the topic title. Isn't your pen's ink gonna run out for all those stories? Hehehe, anyways those short stories are just as long as my Chaos Legion fanfic that my teacher admired.

Comedy? I am hard to please when it comes to comedy but I know you can somehow makes me laugh! I look forward for it!

Gee, dude! I wanna see your Chaos Legion-Rave Master yaoi doujinshi! I promise I won't steal your art. Please lemme see it! e-mail it to me!
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