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| Tweet Topic Started: Apr 9 2008, 11:11 PM (1,598 Views) | |
| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:11 PM Post #1 |
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Guess who is about to become a father, yes its little ole me. Some may already know this but for almost a year I have been planning to adopt a little boy. While I won't go into specifics I will say he is 10 years old and is about to be made aware that he has a potential parent. Later this month the state is presenting a package of his family history and any issues he has to me so I can make an informed decision. Placement with me won't be until mid June but I can honestly say I am damn excited! So I finally spilled my big secret! Other than Lisa and Dotty does anyone else have any experiences with adoption or foster care they would be willing to share? Thanks |
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:17 PM Post #2 |
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TONY!!! That's AMAZING!! I am so happy and PROUD of you!!! Adoption is one of the most beautiful things on Earth. I don't want to have kids, I want to adopt someday, there are so many children in need of a family. Beautiful what you did, I am happy for you Tony, really. People prefer adopting a newborn, and you will adopt a 10 year old, that's more than fantastic! A 10 year old understands how important is a family, and he will be so gratefull. Beautiful!!! Everything will work, for sure!!!
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:19 PM Post #3 |
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I hope so. To be honest I am scared a bit too. |
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| bluemeanie | Apr 9 2008, 11:19 PM Post #4 |
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is now a happily married woman x
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you've done it Tony I can now unzip my lips lol
Have you completed the course now I am soooooooooo excited and proud of you Tony and you know that
and that little boy is lovely too
Can't wait to meet him when we come over love you Tony |
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Jayne x is loving life and is so happy xxx | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:22 PM Post #5 |
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Yes Jayne the course is over. Next is the homestudy which is almost through then they pass it along to the state dept of children. I am told the only thing that could stop this now is me. So it is happening. By the way, when are you coming over? |
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| Beatlesaholic | Apr 9 2008, 11:25 PM Post #6 |
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Me At Thanksgiving On November 24, 2011.
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Congratulations Tony!
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Paul John George Ringo Are My Favorite Beatles! The Beatles Rule!!!!! Beatles Biggest Fan Kirsten Julian Lennon Biggest Fan RIP John Lennon RIP George Harrison RIP Maurice Gibb RIP Andy Gibb RIP Michael Jackson RIP Grandpa Nick RIP Grandma Tess My Favorite Beatles Movie And Album Is A Hard Day's Night & My Favorite Paul McCartney Album Is Good Evening New York City! Gold Strawberry: BeatlesBiggestFan (16 votes) ![]() | |
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| DCBeatle64 | Apr 9 2008, 11:25 PM Post #7 |
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This is so cool, Like I said to you, you will make a great dad. Its good this wee boy is gonna have someone permanent to look after him. I've seen so many kids go in and out homes (my aunt fosters) so its so nice when kids like this get a permanent place to call home. I am really happy for you and good luck |
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I'm a BIGGER Beatles fan than you and I'm an even BIGGER Wings fan than that... 'You're a Paul McCartney fan? No you're a Wings fan'. 'Thankyou Scotland' Ho Hey Ho... ![]() I am the buttplug goo goo goo joob | |
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| bluemeanie | Apr 9 2008, 11:25 PM Post #8 |
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is now a happily married woman x
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hopefully it will be either late summer this year or next year - but defo coming over - its just finances :hmm: you know where I am if you ever want to talk sooo excited for you
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Jayne x is loving life and is so happy xxx | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:25 PM Post #9 |
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Thank you Kristen. |
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| Beatlesaholic | Apr 9 2008, 11:26 PM Post #10 |
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Me At Thanksgiving On November 24, 2011.
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Your Welcome Tony!
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Paul John George Ringo Are My Favorite Beatles! The Beatles Rule!!!!! Beatles Biggest Fan Kirsten Julian Lennon Biggest Fan RIP John Lennon RIP George Harrison RIP Maurice Gibb RIP Andy Gibb RIP Michael Jackson RIP Grandpa Nick RIP Grandma Tess My Favorite Beatles Movie And Album Is A Hard Day's Night & My Favorite Paul McCartney Album Is Good Evening New York City! Gold Strawberry: BeatlesBiggestFan (16 votes) ![]() | |
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| doris mendlovitz | Apr 9 2008, 11:27 PM Post #11 |
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Muzel Tov and good going love doris. |
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:27 PM Post #12 |
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Thank you Dani. What age group does your Aunt foster? Any problems or concerns she had that you could share? |
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:28 PM Post #13 |
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I know where you are as you know where I am. You are a good friend Jayne. |
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:30 PM Post #14 |
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Thank you Doris, btw how is Petey doing? |
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| DCBeatle64 | Apr 9 2008, 11:33 PM Post #15 |
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well it has in the past generally been younger kids but the last one she has had and still has is now 2 and has been with them for 18 months which isnt normal at all. Now they are planning on giving the kid to his grandmother but because he has become part of our family as such they still want my uncle and aunt to have contact with the kid which is not a normal situation to be in. Luckily this kid isnt younger so he knows he will be an adopted child rather than finding out later on in life. My mum was adopted although when she was a baby and the best piece of advice I could prob give you is just try to be as honest as possible.I know thats not always realistic but especially when he gets older, honesty can be quite important, But you're technically just gonna be like anyother parent now and learn as it happens |
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I'm a BIGGER Beatles fan than you and I'm an even BIGGER Wings fan than that... 'You're a Paul McCartney fan? No you're a Wings fan'. 'Thankyou Scotland' Ho Hey Ho... ![]() I am the buttplug goo goo goo joob | |
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| bluemeanie | Apr 9 2008, 11:34 PM Post #16 |
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is now a happily married woman x
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you are a very good friend too Tony
we need a good catch up soon
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Jayne x is loving life and is so happy xxx | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 9 2008, 11:36 PM Post #17 |
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Well I plan to be honest about everything with him. I want him to feel loved and respected. Can't feel that if you've been lied too. BTW your Aunt and Uncle must have made a great impact on that childs life. |
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| Jacaranda | Apr 10 2008, 12:00 AM Post #18 |
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Tony I am so happy for you. What a good dad you'll make. Though I was cautioned against giving you my two cents...
.... (anyone else other than Dotty and Lisa have anything to say?) I will say that anytime you have any questions or just want to talk just ask. I've attended several adoption conferences, been to classes and read a boatload of books.Plus besides Grace I know many people that have been adopted (I have an acquaintance that adopted six children over the age of 5!). Congratulations! And I'll say it again in person with a big hug come Liverpool!
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| beatlechick | Apr 10 2008, 12:17 AM Post #19 |
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In Paul's Arms!
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So happy for you and your prospective son! I have know many people over the years that have adopted. Sure there are some risks, but I think you know that already. One of the adopted children wanted to find her real mom when she was a teenager, she never met her, but after several years found out that her real mom was really her adopted mom. For she may not have given birth to her but raised her into the adult she is. I have often thought of adopting but my finances have said pretty much no. Just dawned on me that one of the ladies I work with has 4 kids of her own but has adopted 3 older kids. She loves all of her kids as her own no matter if they were biological or not. Congratulations! So very proud of you.
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| Dorfliedot | Apr 10 2008, 12:35 AM Post #20 |
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My twin brother was adopted by a single father. Just remember it takes time to get use to each other. Remember some kids come with lot stuff. they may not show they want to be loved. but, they do. also, trust takes time too. Never talk real bad about a child in front of them. that is is a real no, no. Congratulations.. I wish you all the best. |
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| FamousGroupie | Apr 10 2008, 01:15 AM Post #21 |
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Congratulations and kudos to you, Tony. This is a brilliant unselfish act you've done, and you'll make a wonderful father. I can't say I've had any experience with the adoption process, but talking as a parent, it will soon feel like your heart grew legs and is now running around outside your body. I wish you and your son all the best. |
| I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me. | |
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| Queenbee | Apr 10 2008, 01:22 AM Post #22 |
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Tony ~ How wonderful your going to be a Dad. At least you won't have to change diapers!
My daughter adopted a little girl from South Korea. She was 6 months old when they received her. Naturally my daughter was in a world of her own. They have a son but couldn't conceive any more children so this was the answer to her prayer. I however wondered how I would feel with her and my other grandchildren. I have 7 grandchildren, 3 of them only months apart from the adopted child. I can honestly say I love her just as much as I love the other grandchildren. I will leave the same inheritance, the same jewelry or any other thing she may like just as would my blood grandchildren. it's funny how you love someone the first time you see them ~~ just as it is with birth.The world needs more people like you and Lisa and my daughter who find it in their hearts to love a child who desperately needs a family. Be a parent, not a friend, and give as much love as you have in your heart. and never feel uncomfortable giving him a hug and saying I love you. Teach him men shake hands but Dad's and son DO hug and say I love you! Make it a habit to say before bed time. |
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PEACE and love to my friends, Judy When the Power of Love over comes the Love of Power, the world will know Peace. -Sri Chinmnoy Ghose Till me meet again ~ I Love you Mike! You were one of a kind. | |
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| fab4fan | Apr 10 2008, 01:47 AM Post #23 |
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TONY! What fantastic news. I wish you and your new son the best of luck. I have to admit I've been taken quite by suprise but I'm sure you'll be a great dad and that the kid is one lucky son of a gun.
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| Mnisthiti mou Kurie! | |
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| Rose | Apr 10 2008, 02:38 AM Post #24 |
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Well, here's another clue for you all, the Walrus was Paul...
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Great news, Tony!!! I'm so happy for you!!!
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| ogoble | Apr 10 2008, 02:41 AM Post #25 |
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I wish you all the luck with this adoption, Tony. I know you'll be a great dad.BTW, I've been thinking about adopting a 19 year old Swedish girl myself.
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| Bill | Apr 10 2008, 02:52 AM Post #26 |
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Tony, you utter legend!
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| Rose | Apr 10 2008, 03:04 AM Post #27 |
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Well, here's another clue for you all, the Walrus was Paul...
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Tony, I just wanted to add that a good friend of mine runs "Gift of Adoption Fund". He himself has adopted 3 children...and he helps people who need help with adoption. I don't know if this will help you or not...but here is the link to his site. http://www.giftofadoption.org/About.asp |
![]() "I'm in awe of McCartney. He's about the only one that I am in awe of. He can do it all. And he's never let up... He's just so damn effortless." ~ Bob Dylan | |
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| BlueMolly2009 | Apr 10 2008, 03:15 AM Post #28 |
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LOLcat Freak
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Congrats Tony. That is wonderful news.
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Molly Myspace My Twitter My FriendFeed My Facebook ![]() Boston Chihuahuas (I took this while at a Starbucks) | |
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| maccascruff | Apr 10 2008, 04:47 AM Post #29 |
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Sing the Changes
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Tony, I never told a person, but was wondering how this was going. You decided to adopt only one boy, not two? Is this the one that wants to travel? Have you moved into a house? Too many questions. Time for a great big hug for you for doing such a wonderful thing.
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| JeffLynnesBeard | Apr 10 2008, 10:37 AM Post #30 |
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That's great news, Tony - I'm sure you'll make a wonderful Dad, although I can completely understand why you'd be nervous, it's certainly a huge responsibility. I wish you all the luck in the world, but knowing the kind, big-hearted person you are, you'll probably take to it like a duck to water. Any bets that, by the age of 12, the kid will be a Wings fanatic?
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| ...and in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make. | |
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| LadyMacca | Apr 10 2008, 05:23 PM Post #31 |
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Congratulations on adopting Tony! That's such wonderful & exciting news! I wish the best for you and your son! My brother Loren is thinking of adopting a boy as well, once he makes his move to Chicago an gets settled, so we're all excited for when that happens! You'll make an awesome dad, for sure!
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| Bag O' Nails | Apr 10 2008, 06:50 PM Post #32 |
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MaccaMomma
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Well, despite the fact that you are a liberal
....JUST KIDDING ....I'm in awe of people who have a heart big enough to adopt an older child! CONGRATULATIONS and many blessings to you as you go through this process!
Many of my friends have adopted children (but all were babies) of all races (Chinese, African-American/caucasion, Pacific Islander, etc.). Some were open adoptions; others not. I wish more people in this world would be as loving and open as you... Looking forward to meeting you in L'pool!
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| beatlespud | Apr 10 2008, 09:04 PM Post #33 |
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Congrats Tony! Dean |
| Save the whales, collect the entire set!!! | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 11 2008, 12:20 AM Post #34 |
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Lisa, you know I didn't mean it like that. Stop being a hardass
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| Deleted User | Apr 11 2008, 12:22 AM Post #35 |
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Thank you Cathy. Here in RI your income doesn't matter, they just want people willing to care and raise these wonderful kids. |
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| Deleted User | Apr 11 2008, 12:22 AM Post #36 |
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Dotty you give very wise advise, you amaze me sometimes. |
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| Deleted User | Apr 11 2008, 12:27 AM Post #37 |
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I was going to respond to each of you but I will be here all night. Clare you have shown yourself as a kind and caring mom, may have to ask you for your sage advice every now and then. John, Olen, Dean, Bill, and Andy I will annoy you beyond belief. You are exceptional human beings and I believe I could learn many things about being a father from all of you. Rose, Linda, and Molly thank you and know your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed. |
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| Deleted User | Apr 11 2008, 12:33 AM Post #38 |
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Liz support your brother and let him know you always will. Your a kind soul. Bags, as a liberal I understand that it takes a village to raise a child. Strawberry Fields may be a message board on the internet but the people who post here have turned this into a funky village full of wisdom, hope, and love. For that I am eternally greatful. |
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| LadyMacca | Apr 11 2008, 12:57 AM Post #39 |
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Yup, I totally support my brother 100% with whatever he does. He knows it to. But I think sometimes he forgets, but I never fail to remind him. I cannot wait for you to get your son an I look foward to hearing more about him! |
| -Liz | |
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| Bag O' Nails | Apr 11 2008, 01:52 AM Post #40 |
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I don't know why that is a liberal thought...except for the fact that a liberal said it! Even as a conservative, I agree it takes more than one person to raise a child...and a loving parent is the essential foundation which you obviously are providing! I'd sure like to know the story behind this adoption...if that's something you'd wish to share with the rest of us. And I agree, this board is a great place! |
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| Dorfliedot | Apr 11 2008, 03:45 AM Post #41 |
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Tony, you are amazing person. I know you do will. and, will do your best. if you ever need advice when comes to adopted child ask me. I can give you some what advice. Some might be good or some might be OK. but, I'll do my best to help. Some of my foster parent that were good gave up on me to soon. I was about to come around. at the time they gave up. it is trust that is hard to except right away. I don't know why, I amaze you I am nothing. bu, another person that is in this world. |
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| SherryO | Apr 11 2008, 08:39 PM Post #42 |
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Congrats,Tony! Best wishes to you, & your new son! Take care!
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| Jacaranda | Apr 12 2008, 12:52 AM Post #43 |
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Never!
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| MaccasGirl | Apr 12 2008, 01:48 AM Post #44 |
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Wow, Tony, congratulations! What exciting news! I'm sure you will be a wonderful dad to this boy and any others you may adopt in the future. I hope you love being a parent as much as I do. It is one of the best things in life.
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| Mia Culpa | Apr 12 2008, 02:48 AM Post #45 |
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Happy Father's Day! Raising stable children is the greatest thing. Taking a child from an unstable environment and giving them a loving home is the best social welfare. I grew up listening to adoption stories from my father. From that my best advice is to let them know who they are and where they're from. |
| If you read my posts backward there's evidence that Paul is dead. | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 13 2008, 10:41 AM Post #46 |
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Tony, one of my half sisters was fostered and then adopted. Her new family are lovely, I met them all once. You're a lovely person and will make a great dad. I'm happy for you, congratulations. X |
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| Deleted User | Apr 13 2008, 07:05 PM Post #47 |
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Sherry, Mia, Diane, and Violet thank you very much for the good thoughts. Just wish more of my family felt this way. |
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| DCBeatle64 | Apr 13 2008, 07:46 PM Post #48 |
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Are your family not cool about it?? |
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I'm a BIGGER Beatles fan than you and I'm an even BIGGER Wings fan than that... 'You're a Paul McCartney fan? No you're a Wings fan'. 'Thankyou Scotland' Ho Hey Ho... ![]() I am the buttplug goo goo goo joob | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 13 2008, 11:32 PM Post #49 |
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They think I am a fool for wanting to help a stranger. They keep telling me I can forget about traveling and such. I tell them the kid is going to log more miles then them and they should get over it. |
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| Dorfliedot | Apr 14 2008, 12:12 AM Post #50 |
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People thinking like that is why some kids never get adopted. Also, got to realize, That you are also a stranger to them too. you know when you love someone and they go away and your heart hurts really bad. That is how feel to a child when they leave a home. and, they also don't know what to expect from there new home. Are they going treat me OK. or what. It hard going from one home to another. believe it or not most foster families I got were in it for money they got. I remember one foster family I like them a lot but, they didn't want me. and, I remember holding the tears inside. because, I didn't want them to see me cry. When the other foster mother got me I burst into tears. and ask, *Why do people say I'll see you later and never do?* A child heart can be broken. so, many times that they don't know how to show love if they want too. You want to know why, my mind is mess up? from all the foster homes and children home. mental hospitals, and group homes That I been too. William and I been abused in many ways. If not sexually, we were beaten. I even had a foster dad threatening to kill me. When you get a child it best to find out what abuse they been though. and, get them some help. Don't get me wrong tony there is some good foster homes out there. When I did get good foster homes I ruin it for myself. |
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| Deleted User | Apr 14 2008, 12:17 AM Post #51 |
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Dotty the classes the state makes you take are how to recognize abuse of all forms. They also teach us how to deal with being pushed away by the child. Better to push the prospective parent away then to be dumped by them later. I for one cannot fathom telling a child it isn't working, you gotta go. Will be taking weekly counseling with this child so that we can learn to get along. It won't be easy but I cannot see a child having no home when I can take them in. |
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| Dorfliedot | Apr 14 2008, 12:20 AM Post #52 |
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Well, that is what half my foster family did they tellll me is.. we don't want you. and, they will tell me things too. Like not even your own mom wanted you. You are brat. you are ugly. and, other things. This why I say, don't talk about child in front of them. You May Talk to them about what they are doing wrong. but, not with insults. A child does take all that in. even if you think they don't. I use to pretend that I didn't hear them. |
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| Jacaranda | Apr 14 2008, 12:30 AM Post #53 |
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Dotty I am so sorry that you have had so many bad experiences in the foster system. Our system here in the U.S. is so screwy it is heartbreaking. Tony, I am sorry your family has to be so hardhearted. But remember things can very well change when they get to know your son. Even children born to us are strangers at first, as well as all our friends, spouses and significant others. With some relationships that changes instantly, with some it takes a little longer. When he is family he will no longer be a stranger. The experience of raising a child is exactly what you put into it, as with marriages, friendships and even posting on message boards. You are so brave my friend. Many kudos to you. |
![]() "If nothing else works, a total pig-headed unwillingness to look facts in the face will see us through." General Melchett, Blackadder Goes Forth | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 14 2008, 12:35 AM Post #54 |
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Dotty people who foster children only for the money make me sick. I am sorry you had such bad experiences with the foster system. You are a survivor and that where your strengths come from. |
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| Deleted User | Apr 14 2008, 12:36 AM Post #55 |
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Lisa they are slowly coming around. I think they are more worried about me then anything. |
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| Dorfliedot | Apr 14 2008, 12:37 AM Post #56 |
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I am not trying to get people to feel sorry for me. I tell about my experince. so, no child will go though what I did. Also, to help Tony get better standing on what some kids may have gone though. What happen to me may have never happen to others. Like I said, there are good foster homes out there. A child that finds them is truely bless. I did have one. but, I blew it with them. I cuss and she slap me for cussing and, I fell she went to help me up and, I punch her. I didn't mean to but, it was a reaction to her hiting me. I lived at hillsides and use to fight with the other girls there. so, I was use to defending myself a lot. Until this day I am upset with myself for doing that to her. and, of caurse she got rid of me.
When the social worker was soppose to come I acted all excited like I was happy she was coming to get me. The truth. I really nerves. and, upset. but, I didn't want her to see it. because, I thought she didn't care. she getting rid of me.
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| Deleted User | Apr 14 2008, 12:40 AM Post #57 |
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Dotty no one here thinks you are trying to get them to feel sorry for you, get that out of your head. We all have things happen in life we wish we could do over. I sincerly am glad to have a friend like you to give me guidance. |
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| Dorfliedot | Apr 14 2008, 12:41 AM Post #58 |
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Thank you Tony. Even though I can talk your head off?
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| Bill | Apr 14 2008, 05:23 AM Post #59 |
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Every child is a stranger. Just because a child shares your DNA doesn't make them less of a stranger. Every parent and child take time to bond with one another. Granted, it's often quicker and easier when it sprang from your own loins but you will not be strangers for long either. Admit it, you just don't want to change sh*tty nappies do you? And who can blame you? Talk about the best of both worlds! :lol:
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| Mia Culpa | Apr 14 2008, 03:21 PM Post #60 |
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There's no greater expression of love than the willingness to wipe somebody's butt. |
| If you read my posts backward there's evidence that Paul is dead. | |
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| Mia Culpa | Apr 14 2008, 03:22 PM Post #61 |
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I need to get out more.
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| If you read my posts backward there's evidence that Paul is dead. | |
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| Jacaranda | Apr 14 2008, 06:31 PM Post #62 |
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You are too right Mia! :lol: (about the butt wiping, the other message well, that's your call entirely) |
![]() "If nothing else works, a total pig-headed unwillingness to look facts in the face will see us through." General Melchett, Blackadder Goes Forth | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 15 2008, 12:36 AM Post #63 |
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Aint that the truth, lol |
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| Jacaranda | Apr 15 2008, 01:03 AM Post #64 |
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Actually guys, speaking from experience, the diapers are no sweat compared to the toilet training part.
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![]() "If nothing else works, a total pig-headed unwillingness to look facts in the face will see us through." General Melchett, Blackadder Goes Forth | |
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| FamousGroupie | Apr 15 2008, 01:05 AM Post #65 |
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I can vouch for that. Charlotte is nearly five years old and flatly refuses to use the toilet at all. |
| I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me. | |
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| maccascruff | Apr 15 2008, 01:22 AM Post #66 |
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Sing the Changes
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This family knows that you will be a great dad, Tony. I'm sure there will be rough days and trying times. Any parent goes through those. However, you have the heart for this and will be giving a child a much needed home.
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| Dr.WinstonO'Boogie | Apr 15 2008, 02:39 PM Post #67 |
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Yes, that is the best advice I can give you too. I am adopted and my parents told me about that when I was four. At the age of 3 my parents adopted another child, he knows too, that he is adopted, but he never talks about it. I wrote a letter to my mother but she wrote back, that she does not want to get in contact with me. She found out that she was pregnant when she was together with her next boyfriend, who became her husband. He told her: it's the baby or me...so she decided to give me away. I had to live six month in children's home before I was adopted. But it was the best thing in life that could happen to me!! My mother is- as far as I can judge from her letter- a person who gives in soon to her husband, she is even afraid of her own sons that they may find out that they have a halfsister! What could she give to me..she was poor when she gave me away, my parents could give me more, I got a good education, I could study and I never missed a thing really. I love my parents and there is no difference to other people whose parents are their "real" parents. I wish you all the best...I am happy you decided to give a child a new home! You will do it right, I am sure, Tony! Astrid |
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One day, you'll look, to see I've gone - but tomorrow may rain so I'll follow the sun | |
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| beatlespud | Apr 15 2008, 08:51 PM Post #68 |
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Wouldn't do much to annoy me Tony, I met my wife when both her kids were adults so I can't take credit/blame for how they turned out.
Dean |
| Save the whales, collect the entire set!!! | |
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| Rose | Apr 15 2008, 09:01 PM Post #69 |
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Well, here's another clue for you all, the Walrus was Paul...
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Hmmm...maybe its a girl thing? My boys were trained before they were 2 1/2 years old. And although it was a bit time consuming, I didn't find it all that difficult. My best solution? I bribed them...and it worked. "You want that <insert toy or candy of choice here>? Go pee and/or poopie on the potty!" :lol: |
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| Dorfliedot | Apr 15 2008, 11:35 PM Post #70 |
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my grand son is almost four and not potty train. My youngest daughter was potty train at 11 months. but, my other 3 were potty train before they were two. My granddaughter Julie is almost potty train and she is 2 1/2 I think it has to do with the child. Some learn faster then others. |
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| FamousGroupie | Apr 15 2008, 11:39 PM Post #71 |
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Nah, Charlotte has real anxiety problems, and not just dealing with the toilet. I've tried everything, but to see her so distressed when I try and force her to go on the potty is just not worth my heartache. |
| I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me. | |
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| Reverend Dave | Apr 16 2008, 04:18 AM Post #72 |
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I can't add much to the potty discussion, but I think what you're doing Tony is great. I wish more people could open their hearts to all these children who need a loving home more than anything. All these debates about politics, religion and the environment mean nothing if we can't even love the world's children. |
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With great power comes great responsibility. With great age.... What was I going to say? | |
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| jayjay | Apr 16 2008, 04:17 PM Post #73 |
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This is fantastic, Tony! Congratulations! It takes a very special person to adopt. And at the age you are adopting him is just wonderful. At that age, the child must be so appreciative and excited. I wish you all the best in your new father role. It's gonna be AWESOME!!!
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| ohnotjimagain | Apr 16 2008, 05:45 PM Post #74 |
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Congratulations Tony. You will be a great dad.
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| With every mistake we must surely be learning. | |
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| iscreamer1 | Apr 16 2008, 06:07 PM Post #75 |
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Tony it takes a very special man with an obvious very big heart to take on this kind of commitment. You are changing this little boys life forever by giving him the love, security and sense of belonging we all deserve. I wish the both of you the very best. My uncle adopted his son as a new born. He and his wife have divorced and the witch, I mean wife, has given full custody to my uncle. It has been a struggle at times but my uncle loves this kid more than anything in the world and wouldn't change one thing. Look forward to meeting you in L-pool where I hope to hear all about your new son!! |
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people - Victor Borge | |
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| Deleted User | Apr 19 2008, 02:28 AM Post #76 |
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Thanks everyone. Very nice to have support for this, even if it is virtual support. The London/Liverpool peeps will meet the little guy next year as the first thing I am doing is getting him a passport. |
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| bluemeanie | Apr 19 2008, 01:14 PM Post #77 |
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is now a happily married woman x
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not to sound jealous hope it Liverpool first
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Jayne x is loving life and is so happy xxx | |
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| Deleted User | May 4 2008, 09:53 PM Post #78 |
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Finally had my meeting with the adoption social worker. They are filling out the paperwork and coming here next week to discuss it some more. When I started this last spring I was confident everything would be ok but now am having second thoughts. Financially I have taken a big hit thanks to the declining markets. To be honest if I hadn't booked my vacation already I wouldn't be going. Maybe I am just getting cold feet, who knows. |
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| Dorfliedot | May 4 2008, 11:05 PM Post #79 |
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The out come is better then a trip. That is just my opinion.
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| beatlechick | May 5 2008, 12:19 AM Post #80 |
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In Paul's Arms!
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It's only because now that the work is starting, it's becoming a reality. Don't sweat being scared, if it's the right thing to do it will all work out. I think you will do just fine with your son. |
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| maccascruff | May 5 2008, 12:25 AM Post #81 |
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Sing the Changes
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Tony, I think it's natural to be nervous. It will all work out if that is what you want to do. It's up to you to decide if it is right or wrong for you. |
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| ~LovelyRita~ | May 5 2008, 01:18 AM Post #82 |
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I'm rooting for you Tony, I hope to be doing the same thing in 5 or 10 years. If you can get through it the rewards will far outweigh the costs. |
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| bluemeanie | May 5 2008, 03:20 PM Post #83 |
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is now a happily married woman x
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Tony
everything will be fine
you know where I am if you wanna chat
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Jayne x is loving life and is so happy xxx | |
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| Monkey Chow | May 5 2008, 03:43 PM Post #84 |
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beep beep m beep beep yeah
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We adopted my son because we couldn't have children and then had my daughter the old-fashioned way 18 months later. It has been great. Of course parenthood has its not-so-great moments. |
| Everybody's got something to hide 'cept for me and my monkey. | |
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| Dorfliedot | May 5 2008, 06:54 PM Post #85 |
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It not always easy. But, in the long run it worth it.
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| Deleted User | May 10 2008, 10:10 PM Post #86 |
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May sound scared but am actually looking forward to having him here. Hopefully his move in date will be in July, am taking eight weeks out of work to help him get used to me and the house. That could be fun, may have to go camping or something. |
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| bluemeanie | May 10 2008, 10:53 PM Post #87 |
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is now a happily married woman x
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awww cool Tony
you will be fine
remember I know how you are with children
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Jayne x is loving life and is so happy xxx | |
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| Deleted User | May 11 2008, 12:11 AM Post #88 |
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Macky D Sundays
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| iscreamer1 | May 11 2008, 12:15 AM Post #89 |
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Yeah, it's amazing how you find the money and the time when it involves your child. It will be great Tony, this is one lucky kid! |
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people - Victor Borge | |
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| maccascruff | May 11 2008, 02:17 AM Post #90 |
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Sing the Changes
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Good for you, Tony. We have a client who is adopting by herself. She was in last week and doesn't even know if she gets a girl or boy or what age and she gets the child next week! How do you even get the house ready in this circumstance. |
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| LadyMacca | May 11 2008, 09:30 AM Post #91 |
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Tony you still (and will always) have my support!
You can do this!
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| -Liz | |
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| maccascruff | May 11 2008, 04:51 PM Post #92 |
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Sing the Changes
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There was an article on foster kids in our paper today. The chancellor of the local uni and his wife have fostered nine children over the years. Now the kids are adults and the family is sending one of the kids to cosmetology school. Some are using the internet to find them and get back in touch with them. They made the point that it isn't always easy, but it was worth it. You can do this, Tony. I wish I thought I had the patience. |
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| Deleted User | May 25 2008, 02:26 PM Post #93 |
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Thought I'd update you all. Last week I had my final meeting with the social worker. He is going to be presenting the home study and the paperwork to the state agency and then we wait. He told me it could be anytime between now and September. I really hope there will be an aswer when I get back from the trip. |
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| iscreamer1 | May 25 2008, 02:41 PM Post #94 |
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Hope it's before Sept. so you can get him started in school at the beginning. GOOD LUCK!! |
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people - Victor Borge | |
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| bluemeanie | May 25 2008, 04:28 PM Post #95 |
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is now a happily married woman x
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this is soo exciting Tony not long to go now
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Jayne x is loving life and is so happy xxx | |
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| Deleted User | Jul 27 2008, 08:50 PM Post #96 |
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Recently I have had a few pms asking how everything was going and I thought I'd update you all. First it ain't happened yet. The state is very slow acting but the social worker says that is normal, we are just playing the waiting game. I did hear the little boy I wanted to adopt is being adopted by a nice family. I am glad for him as he was a nice kid. I originally started this after seeing another child on a Tuesdays Child segment of my local news. He was older and a big Beatles fan and I thought thats the kid for me. However he found a home and I decided that this one kid was enough. Now they have adopted him out too. Sounds horrible but none of the other kids I have seen spark an interest in me. They all want a parent to take them to Disney and buy them stuff. The two I was interested in wanted a bed of their own and a home. Now if I was without parents I would probably say the same but who knows I might say I wanted Disney too. Well if they find a kid that I click with I guess it doesn't really matter. They need a home and I can provide one. Will keep you all posted though this isn't Beatles related
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| iscreamer1 | Jul 27 2008, 08:54 PM Post #97 |
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Been thinking about this too Tony. Thanks for the update. Good Luck, I know it will happen when the right kid comes along. |
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people - Victor Borge | |
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| Dorfliedot | Jul 27 2008, 09:39 PM Post #98 |
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Tony, I Hope you find that right kids. I think you will make a great father.
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| Deleted User | Jul 27 2008, 09:41 PM Post #99 |
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Well if it happens it happens, no rush here. |
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| Deleted User | Jul 27 2008, 09:41 PM Post #100 |
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Thank you my friend
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and that little boy is lovely too





.... (anyone else other than Dotty and Lisa have anything to say?) I will say that anytime you have any questions or just want to talk just ask. I've attended several adoption conferences, been to classes and read a boatload of books.
I have know many people over the years that have adopted. Sure there are some risks, but I think you know that already. One of the adopted children wanted to find her real mom when she was a teenager, she never met her, but after several years found out that her real mom was really her adopted mom. For she may not have given birth to her but raised her into the adult she is. I have often thought of adopting but my finances have said pretty much no. Just dawned on me that one of the ladies I work with has 4 kids of her own but has adopted 3 older kids. She loves all of her kids as her own no matter if they were biological or not.









....JUST KIDDING
....I'm in awe of people who have a heart big enough to adopt an older child! CONGRATULATIONS and many blessings to you as you go through this process!

When the social worker was soppose to come I acted all excited like I was happy she was coming to get me. The truth. I really nerves. and, upset. but, I didn't want her to see it. because, I thought she didn't care. she getting rid of me.
I need to get out more.


2:21 PM Jul 11