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| Man to Take Wife's Name; I love this story | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 9 2007, 01:04 AM (469 Views) | |
| beatlechick | Jan 9 2007, 01:04 AM Post #1 |
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In Paul's Arms!
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Ain't California grand?!?
Man Fights to Take Wife's Name in Marriage ACLU Joins Effort to Change California Law By MICHELLE RITTNER Jan. 8, 2007 — - What's in a name? Before Michael Buday married his fiancée, Diana Bijon, he decided to honor her family by bucking tradition and taking her last name. But, it wasn't so easy. Under California state law, he needed to pay more than $300, go to court, file a petition, and publicly advertise his name change for four weeks in a local newspaper. If he had simply gone along with tradition, it would have cost only $50 to $80. So Buday, 29, went to court, along with the ACLU, to change the law. They recently announced their plans to sue the California Department of Health Services, which oversees marriage licenses and name changes. After years of fighting for women's rights, the ACLU is now battling for equal rights for men. California is one of 44 states with unequal name change laws for people getting married. Right now, only six states -- Georgia, Hawaii, Iowa, Massachusetts, New York and North Dakota -- explicitly allow a man to change his name through marriage with the same ease as a woman can. California is not the only state with a high price tag for a groom's name change. In Illinois, a man wishing to take his wife's surname must fork over $246 for a petition and another $150 to publish the change in a newspaper. Connecticut's price is slightly lower, at only $150 for a court petition. According to the ACLU, the obstacles facing a husband who wishes to adopt his wife's last name violate the equal protection clause provided by the 14th Amendment of the Constitution. "California has the perfect marriage application for the 17th century," said Mark Rosenbaum, legal director of the ACLU of Southern California. "The laws reflect a mind-set that the wife is to be subordinate to the husband." In California, a surname change for the husband is not even an option during the marriage process. Instead, the man must go through a regular name change process, as if he were changing his first name from Bob to Jim. When contacted, the California Department of Health Services would not comment on the current state of the law. "At every junction, the message is 'select the name of the husband,'" Rosenbaum said. Buday was unavailable for comment, but he was quoted in an ACLU press release as saying, "It's not about the money, it's about the principle of families being able to make their own decisions. Diana's dad has become my father figure, and I want to honor that." Gloria Allred, a top women's rights attorney in Los Angeles, fully supports the ACLU's efforts. "In California we have made a deliberate effort to try to remove from state laws and regulations any distinctions or burdens made on gender," she said. As for Buday's personal decision to adopt his wife's last name, Allred adds that "the point is not if he wishes to change his name, but that he has a right to do it." Buday, she says, is set apart from most men because "he is secure enough" to take his wife's surname. Of course civil rights lawyers back Buday, but what would an etiquette coach say? Jodi Smith, head of Mannersmith etiquette consulting, also backs him. "I do see this as a gender equality issue," she says. "Now that women are considered 'real' and 'legal' people, last names should be a matter of choice." Will the male name swap soon become a trend? No data exists on how common the practice is. But many couples in recent years have chosen to combine their last names. For instance, Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa (born Antonio Villar) and his wife, Corina Raigosa, combined their names when they were married in 1987. Although Buday must still legally use his "maiden name," the couple reportedly signed their Christmas cards as Mr. and Mrs. Bijon. Copyright © 2007 ABC News Internet Ventures |
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| Dorfliedot | Jan 9 2007, 01:08 AM Post #2 |
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Beatlelicious
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He will regret it if they were to get a divorce.
I bet..
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| ogoble | Jan 9 2007, 01:49 AM Post #3 |
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I could see me changing my last name to Hilton.
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Beatles/Paul McCartney & Wings Fan
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| Dorfliedot | Jan 9 2007, 01:52 AM Post #4 |
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Beatlelicious
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in your dreams..
:lol:
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| Deleted User | Jan 9 2007, 02:12 AM Post #5 |
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Deleted User
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In this green and beautiful land you do not have to take your husbands name, indeed he can take yours or you can take a completely different one. |
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| BeatleBarb | Jan 9 2007, 02:46 AM Post #6 |
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I remember when I got divorced....the second time, but anyway I was going to revert back to my "original" name. I asked my daughter, who was 5 at the time, how she felt about me changing my name. She said, "oh yeah, Mom, why don't you become Kristy?" |
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| Dorfliedot | Jan 9 2007, 02:48 AM Post #7 |
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Beatlelicious
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:lol:
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| kink | Jan 9 2007, 02:49 AM Post #8 |
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on again, off again
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hahahaha |
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Strawberry Fields: We put the FUN in dysfunctional. -BeatleBarb, 2007 | |
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| Deleted User | Jan 9 2007, 04:53 AM Post #9 |
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Deleted User
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Brilliant! :lol: :lol: :lol: |
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| theonlyfab4fan | Jan 9 2007, 05:18 AM Post #10 |
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I AM THE BIGGEST JOHN FAN!
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LMAO!! Did you tell her Beatlekristy just didn`t have the right ring to it.
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You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' ! I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN | |
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| FamousGroupie | Jan 9 2007, 06:11 AM Post #11 |
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Obsessive Saddo Fangirl
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My future husband is quite welcome to take my last name - as far away from me as possible. :lol: |
| I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me. | |
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| BeatleBarb | Jan 9 2007, 06:52 AM Post #12 |
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Yeah, that silly little twit - BeatleKristy - that's just wrong! I did get a major kick out of it. Here I was so worried about having a different name. It turns out that we all took last different names...for different reasons....lol. |
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| maccascruff | Jan 9 2007, 01:42 PM Post #13 |
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Sing the Changes
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I had a co-worker years ago who had done this. He changed his name legally to his wife's last name because he hated his last name. This was about 25 years ago and I always told him how proud I was of him. |
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| Deleted User | Jan 9 2007, 02:31 PM Post #14 |
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Deleted User
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Good on him. I like what he and John Ono Lennon did and why is it so unusual? Being the dirty hairy feminist I am, if I think long enough about it it really starts to anger me. You become Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and you are pronounced 'Man and Wife'. Why?
Well, I'll only be happy with those 'traditions' when more people start to question them. |
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| BEATNUT | Jan 9 2007, 02:47 PM Post #15 |
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So when you get married FiFi will you become Fiona MaccaByrd-Beard?
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| Location: Self-Imposed Exile. | |
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| Deleted User | Jan 9 2007, 02:51 PM Post #16 |
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double barrelled names are not uncommon here. i for one would not mind changing my name to the ladies if i liked it, i have already changed it once so it would not be a problem. |
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| Deleted User | Jan 9 2007, 03:21 PM Post #17 |
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MaccaBeard, actually. Andy will be Mr. Fiona and that's how I like it.
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| Mark Stephen Baker | Jan 9 2007, 08:07 PM Post #18 |
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I thought about taking my wife's name when we got married but decided people might laugh if I was called Caroline. |
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| Sandra | Jan 9 2007, 11:52 PM Post #19 |
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:lol: |
| <a href='http://eapr-1/@0@Sandra@1@Edinburgh%2C%20Scotland@' target='_blank'></a> | |
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| BlueMolly2009 | Jan 10 2007, 12:07 AM Post #20 |
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LOLcat Freak
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Molly Myspace My Twitter My FriendFeed My Facebook ![]() Boston Chihuahuas (I took this while at a Starbucks) | |
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| JeffLynnesBeard | Jan 10 2007, 12:40 AM Post #21 |
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Administrator & Moderator
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Yes ma'am. So... if a man takes his wife's name - what will she then use once it's taken? |
| ...and in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make. | |
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| Jacaranda | Jan 10 2007, 01:58 AM Post #22 |
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This reminds me of what Sean Lennon said when I told him my married name is Sponaugle. "And you took that name? You're generous!" :lol: |
![]() "If nothing else works, a total pig-headed unwillingness to look facts in the face will see us through." General Melchett, Blackadder Goes Forth | |
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| Deleted User | Jan 10 2007, 02:00 AM Post #23 |
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Deleted User
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doesn't matter she will always open up the post first. |
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| Bill | Jan 10 2007, 03:34 AM Post #24 |
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What about when she wants to change her name? I can't understand why, but many do still want to. |
| Put a puppet on it. | |
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| Mark Stephen Baker | Jan 10 2007, 03:40 PM Post #25 |
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Administrator & Moderator
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Actually neither of us particularly liked our surnames but didn't mind each others so she got her way by taking mine. |
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| Sandra | Jan 10 2007, 07:30 PM Post #26 |
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I don't mind which way around it works regarding taking a name wife take husband's - husband takes wife's but I do think all the double barrelled stuff is silly. What about when double barrelled's daughter meets double barrelled's son and they fall in love... well you get my meaning, besides one of the names still has to be first and personally I think there are still bigger issues to be concerned about. Maybe people should just choose a completely new name to share when they start married life together but then what about all the people who like to research their family tree. |
| <a href='http://eapr-1/@0@Sandra@1@Edinburgh%2C%20Scotland@' target='_blank'></a> | |
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I bet..


:lol:






8:34 AM Jul 11