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Kids Corner
Topic Started: Jun 18 2006, 11:46 AM (477 Views)
FamousGroupie
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Obsessive Saddo Fangirl
I thought I would start a thread for the parents on the board. A lot of us have kids, and I thought it would be good if we had a thread where we could share the things our kids get up to, or give advice if they're sick, or support if they are starting a new school or whatever.

Tell us things your kids say that make you laugh, cry, or just go "Awwww!"
I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me.
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theonlyfab4fan
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Awwww!!!

Cool thread Clare.

David called yesterday to tell us that he got a gig and is leaving for Africa in less than 2 weeks. Told his little sister M`ell about and she said oh really where in Africa? I said "Gambia". "Mom, why is he going all the way over there to gamble when he lives so close to Las Vega"?
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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FamousGroupie
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theonlyfab4fan
Jun 18 2006, 09:53 PM
Awwww!!!

Cool thread Clare.

David called yesterday to tell us that he got a gig and is leaving for Africa in less than 2 weeks. Told his little sister M`ell about and she said oh really where in Africa? I said "Gambia". "Mom, why is he going all the way over there to gamble when he lives so close to Las Vega"?

:lol: :lol:

Charlotte was talking to me the other day, wanting breakfast, and said "Toast please, muffler." :huh:

I thought, what the hell? What does she want a muffler for? What is she talking about?

Then it clicked. She's started calling me Mother.
I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me.
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theonlyfab4fan
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I AM THE BIGGEST JOHN FAN!
I still like the one about the 'nake' she saw. :D
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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theonlyfab4fan
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I AM THE BIGGEST JOHN FAN!
Years ago David was playing baseball in little league. I went to watch him play and had Tim with me and he was around 3 years old at the time.

He had been running around and playing in the leaves beside the bleachers. He came back and sat down directly in front of me. I noticed that he kept hunching forward and making groaning sounds and I thought something was wrong. So I asked him what he was doing. In a very loud voice he said, "I`m cracking my nuts". Of course I was embarrased beyond belief in front of the other parents. Then I saw that he had two pecans that he hand found on the ground. :D
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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HGentile
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Well I don't have kids, but I can share a story of what I did to my parents when I was little.

I was very young and was learning everyone's names. My parents had someone stop by (I believe it was my brother's Sunday School teacher) and I had to share my new knowledge.

So I stood there proudly and said "This is my dad Roger, this is my mom Linda, this is my brother Stacy and then pointed to the dog and said thats the f*cking dog Weezer"

:lol: I wasn't that far off, that is what my dad always called it hahahaha. They were mortified needless to say!
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theonlyfab4fan
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HGentile
Jun 18 2006, 02:51 PM
Well I don't have kids, but I can share a story of what I did to my parents when I was little.

I was very young and was learning everyone's names. My parents had someone stop by (I believe it was my brother's Sunday School teacher) and I had to share my new knowledge.

So I stood there proudly and said "This is my dad Roger, this is my mom Linda, this is my brother Stacy and then pointed to the dog and said thats the f*cking dog Weezer"

:lol: I wasn't that far off, that is what my dad always called it hahahaha. They were mortified needless to say!

Early start on your vocabulary Holly. I noticed it hasn`t changed much over the years. :D
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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maccascruff
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I am the mother of two cats. Does that count? One turned off my internet connection this morning. :lol:
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maccagirl1428
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FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 06:46 AM
I thought I would start a thread for the parents on the board. A lot of us have kids, and I thought it would be good if we had a thread where we could share the things our kids get up to, or give advice if they're sick, or support if they are starting a new school or whatever.

Tell us things your kids say that make you laugh, cry, or just go "Awwww!"

Well i have had 4 miscarages :(
Now in pre menopause. But i do have alot of nephews and nicees.
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maccagirl1428
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maccascruff
Jun 18 2006, 11:31 AM
I am the mother of two cats. Does that count? One turned off my internet connection this morning. :lol:

I think it does :D
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Kit_Kat
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I'm pregnant and a mother to my unborn baby. Do I qualify to be on this board? :)
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maccagirl1428
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Kit_Kat
Jun 18 2006, 03:05 PM
I'm pregnant and a mother to my unborn baby. Do I qualify to be on this board? :)

I would hope so :D
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maccagirl1428
Jun 18 2006, 04:01 PM
FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 06:46 AM
I thought I would start a thread for the parents on the board. A lot of us have kids, and I thought it would be good if we had a thread where we could share the things our kids get up to, or give advice if they're sick, or support if they are starting a new school or whatever.

Tell us things your kids say that make you laugh, cry, or just go "Awwww!"

Well i have had 4 miscarages :(
Now in pre menopause. But i do have alot of nephews and nicees.

So sorry, Summer. Wifey had two herself. :(
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BlueMolly2009
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HGentile
Jun 18 2006, 09:51 AM
Well I don't have kids, but I can share a story of what I did to my parents when I was little.

I was very young and was learning everyone's names. My parents had someone stop by (I believe it was my brother's Sunday School teacher) and I had to share my new knowledge.

So I stood there proudly and said "This is my dad Roger, this is my mom Linda, this is my brother Stacy and then pointed to the dog and said thats the f*cking dog Weezer"

:lol: I wasn't that far off, that is what my dad always called it hahahaha. They were mortified needless to say!

*lol* Holly that's hysterical.

I don't have any kids, but I remember when my cousin's daughter (who will be 18 this year) was a little kid. My brother did something and hit his finger and said, "F8ck!!!" Well, my cousin's daughter, who was I think 2 at the time, started repeating the word. :lol:
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maccagirl1428
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beep
Jun 18 2006, 04:15 PM
maccagirl1428
Jun 18 2006, 04:01 PM
FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 06:46 AM
I thought I would start a thread for the parents on the board. A lot of us have kids, and I thought it would be good if we had a thread where we could share the things our kids get up to, or give advice if they're sick, or support if they are starting a new school or whatever.

Tell us things your kids say that make you laugh, cry, or just go "Awwww!"

Well i have had 4 miscarages :(
Now in pre menopause. But i do have alot of nephews and nicees.

So sorry, Summer. Wifey had two herself. :(

Its ok~
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Kit_Kat
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lol @ Holly that is the funniest thing I have read all day! I need something to cheer me up right now :(
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HGentile
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Kit_Kat
Jun 18 2006, 05:12 PM
lol @ Holly that is the funniest thing I have read all day! I need something to cheer me up right now :(

I could share some more if your in need ;)
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FamousGroupie
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For Betsy:

Charlotte was about eighteen months old, when she came racing in from our yard screaming "Nake, Mummy! NAKE!!"

sh*t, I thought. We live in the bush and snakes can be a problem. I asked her to show me where the "nake" was, and armed with a large stick, went out to see what I could do.

Meanwhile, Lottie is running around in circles, still screaming about the "nake", raced over to the back step, pointed and screamed "NAKE!!!"

I couldn't see a damn snake. Lottie was adamant. She crouched right down and was insisting there was a snake. I went over and took a closer look....


....it was a caterpillar.
I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me.
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Kit_Kat
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HGentile
Jun 18 2006, 10:29 PM
Kit_Kat
Jun 18 2006, 05:12 PM
lol @ Holly that is the funniest thing I have read all day! I need something to cheer me up right now  :(

I could share some more if your in need ;)

Yes please please do share some more and that goes for everyone else too. I've just spent all of today hugging the toilet :(
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bluemeanie
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FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 11:32 PM
For Betsy:

Charlotte was about eighteen months old, when she came racing in from our yard screaming "Nake, Mummy! NAKE!!"

sh*t, I thought. We live in the bush and snakes can be a problem. I asked her to show me where the "nake" was, and armed with a large stick, went out to see what I could do.

Meanwhile, Lottie is running around in circles, still screaming about the "nake", raced over to the back step, pointed and screamed "NAKE!!!"

I couldn't see a damn snake. Lottie was adamant. She crouched right down and was insisting there was a snake. I went over and took a closer look....


....it was a caterpillar.

awwwwwwww :wub:
Jayne x

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Kit_Kat
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FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 10:32 PM
For Betsy:

Charlotte was about eighteen months old, when she came racing in from our yard screaming "Nake, Mummy! NAKE!!"

sh*t, I thought. We live in the bush and snakes can be a problem. I asked her to show me where the "nake" was, and armed with a large stick, went out to see what I could do.

Meanwhile, Lottie is running around in circles, still screaming about the "nake", raced over to the back step, pointed and screamed "NAKE!!!"

I couldn't see a damn snake. Lottie was adamant. She crouched right down and was insisting there was a snake. I went over and took a closer look....


....it was a caterpillar.

Aww bless - kids are sooooo funny and I so can't wait until i'm experiencing them priceless humour moments too :lol:
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theonlyfab4fan
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I AM THE BIGGEST JOHN FAN!
Kit_Kat
Jun 18 2006, 10:40 PM
FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 10:32 PM
For Betsy:

Charlotte was about eighteen months old, when she came racing in from our yard screaming "Nake, Mummy! NAKE!!"

sh*t, I thought. We live in the bush and snakes can be a problem. I asked her to show me where the "nake" was, and armed with a large stick, went out to see what I could do.

Meanwhile, Lottie is running around in circles, still screaming about the "nake", raced over to the back step, pointed and screamed "NAKE!!!"

I couldn't see a damn snake. Lottie was adamant. She crouched right down and was insisting there was a snake. I went over and took a closer look....


....it was a caterpillar.

Aww bless - kids are sooooo funny and I so can't wait until i'm experiencing them priceless humour moments too :lol:

Remember how funny they can be when you are scrubbing poop off you walls that your toddler has used for fingerpaint.
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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Kit_Kat
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Ha ha Betsy - i'll look forward to that! :lol: or just buy it fingerpaints
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HGentile
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What I put my poor mother through!

Betsy, I recalled I took one of my mom's lipsticks and painted the wall under my dad's desk (on wallpaper) and she didn't find it until a few months later when they went to re-arrange the furniture. It never did fully come out :lol:

Also when I was about 2 I somehow got ahold of a jar of Vasoline. I was just in my diaper and was smart enough to cover my entire body in the vasoline. My mother kept trying to pick me up to put me in the tub and try to get it off, but I kept slipping through her hands. She had to wash me how many times cause it didn't want to come off :lol:
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FamousGroupie
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Kit_Kat
Jun 19 2006, 08:49 AM
Ha ha Betsy - i'll look forward to that! :lol: or just buy it fingerpaints

Poop is easier to scrub off the walls. Take it from me.
I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me.
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bluemeanie
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theonlyfab4fan
Jun 18 2006, 11:48 PM
Kit_Kat
Jun 18 2006, 10:40 PM
FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 10:32 PM
For Betsy:

Charlotte was about eighteen months old, when she came racing in from our yard screaming "Nake, Mummy! NAKE!!"

sh*t, I thought. We live in the bush and snakes can be a problem. I asked her to show me where the "nake" was, and armed with a large stick, went out to see what I could do.

Meanwhile, Lottie is running around in circles, still screaming about the "nake", raced over to the back step, pointed and screamed "NAKE!!!"

I couldn't see a damn snake. Lottie was adamant. She crouched right down and was insisting there was a snake. I went over and took a closer look....


....it was a caterpillar.

Aww bless - kids are sooooo funny and I so can't wait until i'm experiencing them priceless humour moments too :lol:

Remember how funny they can be when you are scrubbing poop off you walls that your toddler has used for fingerpaint.

My 2 have done that :( :( abd the amount of times I have had to decorate because they like ripping wallpaper off or 'designing' their own mural :( I don't think I did anything like that when i was little :unsure:
Jayne x

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Kit_Kat
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FamousGroupie
Jun 18 2006, 10:52 PM
Kit_Kat
Jun 19 2006, 08:49 AM
Ha ha Betsy - i'll look forward to that!  :lol:  or just buy it fingerpaints

Poop is easier to scrub off the walls. Take it from me.

Ok kid i'll take it from you :D
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This can be summed up in one word - organised crime
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bluemeanie
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HGentile
Jun 18 2006, 11:51 PM
What I put my poor mother through!

Betsy, I recalled I took one of my mom's lipsticks and painted the wall under my dad's desk (on wallpaper) and she didn't find it until a few months later when they went to re-arrange the furniture. It never did fully come out :lol:

Also when I was about 2 I somehow got ahold of a jar of Vasoline. I was just in my diaper and was smart enough to cover my entire body in the vasoline. My mother kept trying to pick me up to put me in the tub and try to get it off, but I kept slipping through her hands. She had to wash me how many times cause it didn't want to come off :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Holly bet your parents still have a laugh over your antics though :) even though they might not of found them funny at the time :)
Jayne x

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Kit_Kat
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The silliest thing I did was drink white spirit when I was 10 months old - I was a nosey baby :lol:
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theonlyfab4fan
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My two oldest were a year apart. Melissa being the older one was into everything and David was more than willing to follow her lead. When she was about 2 1/2 I had to run to the bathroom and I left them at the table with their lunch. When I got back Melissa had gotten into the pantry and David was covered in Flour, Coffee grounds, Chocolate syrup, and cooking oil.

Then there was the time she locked herself in her bedroom and couldn`t unlock the door. I couldn`t take it off the hinges because they were on the other side. I ended up calling the fire department to come and break into her window as she was on the second floor.
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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HGentile
Jun 18 2006, 06:51 PM
What I put my poor mother through!

Betsy, I recalled I took one of my mom's lipsticks and painted the wall under my dad's desk (on wallpaper) and she didn't find it until a few months later when they went to re-arrange the furniture. It never did fully come out :lol:

Also when I was about 2 I somehow got ahold of a jar of Vasoline. I was just in my diaper and was smart enough to cover my entire body in the vasoline. My mother kept trying to pick me up to put me in the tub and try to get it off, but I kept slipping through her hands. She had to wash me how many times cause it didn't want to come off :lol:

Holly, I was telling your Vaseline story to my mom just this second, and she told me that when I was a toddler, I had cradle cap. So she was constantly putting Vaseline on my head for it. My brother was just then crawling. I took an entire jar of the stuff and slathered a two inch layer of it all over his head!! Mom washed and washed, but wherever he crawled and bumped his head in to the wall, he left a stain! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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maccagirl1428
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I remember when i was 4 my older sister was at camp. We lived in Florida at the time~We had a real bad thunderstrom and i thought the teddy bears eyes were glowing and i threw it away.

My mom caught me and i got a ass beating. :lol: :lol: the stuff you remember

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JeffLynnesBeard
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Some really great stories, people. :lol: I love the 'nake' one, Clare. ^_^

When I was a very little kid, I had this habit of waking up very early in the morning and telephoning people, which made my parents very popular as I got all of our relatives out of bed at 3 or 4 a.m. to answer the 'phone. :P

I also managed to superglue a lump of coal to my hand when I was about three years old, which was interesting. ^_^
...and in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.
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maccagirl1428
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JeffLynnesBeard
Jun 18 2006, 07:24 PM
Some really great stories, people. :lol: I love the 'nake' one, Clare. ^_^

When I was a very little kid, I had this habit of waking up very early in the morning and telephoning people, which made my parents very popular as I got all of our relatives out of bed at 3 or 4 a.m. to answer the 'phone. :P

I also managed to superglue a lump of coal to my hand when I was about three years old, which was interesting. ^_^

lmao :lol: My husband when he was working in putting the tile down in the bathroom got tile glue on his hands and touched the the potty he got glued to it and we had to call 911 :lol:
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bluemeanie
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JeffLynnesBeard
Jun 19 2006, 01:24 AM

When I was a very little kid, I had this habit of waking up very early in the morning and telephoning people, which made my parents very popular as I got all of our relatives out of bed at 3 or 4 a.m. to answer the 'phone. :P


according to my folks I phoned the world and her husband when I was little :D apparently i was speaking to someone in austraila one day when my folks took the phone off me :o for some strange reason I spoke to quite a few libraries as well across the country :blink: the only calls my 2 have made was to these kids competition lines you get on the children's channels :( soon put a block on them once i got my first bill back :o :o :o I'm in the middle of getting a parental lock on my phone at the mo because they are now getting mobile/home numbers from their friends :o
Jayne x

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HGentile
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beep
Jun 18 2006, 06:25 PM
HGentile
Jun 18 2006, 06:51 PM
What I put my poor mother through!

Betsy, I recalled I took one of my mom's lipsticks and painted the wall under my dad's desk (on wallpaper) and she didn't find it until a few months later when they went to re-arrange the furniture.  It never did fully come out  :lol:

Also when I was about 2 I somehow got ahold of a jar of Vasoline.  I was just in my diaper and was smart enough to cover my entire body in the vasoline.  My mother kept trying to pick me up to put me in the tub and try to get it off, but I kept slipping through her hands.  She had to wash me how many times cause it didn't want to come off  :lol:

Holly, I was telling your Vaseline story to my mom just this second, and she told me that when I was a toddler, I had cradle cap. So she was constantly putting Vaseline on my head for it. My brother was just then crawling. I took an entire jar of the stuff and slathered a two inch layer of it all over his head!! Mom washed and washed, but wherever he crawled and bumped his head in to the wall, he left a stain! :lol: :lol: :lol:

My mom will be very pleased to hear I wasn't the only one that did that!!! :lol:

She said that was the hardest thing to wash off ever! Thanks for sharing, I know she will love ot hear it!
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tinybubbleca
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Pregnancy FAQs
Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?
A: If it's the flu, you'll get better.

Q: What is the most common pregnancy craving?
A: For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?
A: 'Cause you're fatter than they are.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: What's the difference between a nine-month pregnant woman and a model?
A: Nothing (if the pregnant woman's husband knows what's good for him).

Q: How long is the average woman in labor?
A: Whatever she says divided by two.

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Does pregnancy cause hemorrhoids?
A: Pregnancy causes anything you want to blame it for.

Q: What does it mean when a baby is born with teeth?
A: It means that the baby's mother may want to rethink her plans to nurse.

Q: What is the best time to wean the baby from nursing?
A: When you see teeth marks.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.
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Kit_Kat
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Does anyone mind if I fill that pregnancy survey thing in? :unsure:
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McGoo
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As I new-ish parent, I am starting to experience some of these stories. :lol: :lol:

As a kid myslef (I wasn't always this mature believe it or not) I remember my dad would show me all these "magic tricks" where large items seemed to be mysteriously disappearing either into his ear or his nose.

One of the times I made a bid to get into the Magic Circle I had to be taken to Hospital with stones stuck up either nostril.

When I say stones, it was closer to boulders.

I blame that incident on the large hooter I developed in adulthood.
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theonlyfab4fan
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I AM THE BIGGEST JOHN FAN!
Then there was the time that Melissa and David were making pretend emergency phone calls on their play phones. One day they used the real phone and called 911 to report the house was on fire. I had no idea that they had made the call. My phone rings and I pick up and a frantic 911 operator is saying ma`am get out of the house the fire department is on the way. Off in the distance I can hear the sirens drawing closer to my house. She obviously had no sense of humor, she didn`t find it funny when I explained that my 3 and 4 year old had been playing with the phone without my knowledge.
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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SherryO
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I think I was 5 years old, when I stood up in the middle of Pastor Grandberg's Sunday sermon, & yelled, "I want SMARTIES!!"
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"Treasure these few words"