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A Joke; religious content please don't look if..
Topic Started: Jun 10 2006, 08:33 PM (375 Views)
Sandra

it is likely to cause you offence.


A Priest, a Pentecostal Preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains to the students of the University of Georgia in Athens.
They would get together two or three times a week at the Varsity for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment.
They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it.

Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the "experience".
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, is on crutches and has various bandages, goes first.
"Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find me a bear.
And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism.
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around so I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."

Reverend Billy Bob Jones spoke next.
He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts and an IV
drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he claimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD!
But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTISED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus"

They both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed.
He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape. Rabbi Stein looks up and struggles to speak to the others. "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start things off..."


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youngformyage
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^ROTFLMAO
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'I'm dead on the surface but I'm screaming underneath' - Coldplay<a href='http://eapr-1/@0@Sam%28antha%29@1@On%20the%20footplate%20of%20the%20Black%20Five@' target='_blank'></a>
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maccagirl1428
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:lol: :lol: ROFLMAO
that was funny!! :D
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Rose
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Well, here's another clue for you all, the Walrus was Paul...
:lol: :lol: :lol: I found it funny! :lol: :lol: :lol:

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"I'm in awe of McCartney. He's about the only one that I am in awe of. He can do it all. And he's never let up... He's just so damn effortless." ~ Bob Dylan
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Merry
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:lol: :lol: :lol:

Very cute, Sandra! :D

(I think only our male board members would find this "offensive"! ;) )


:) Merry


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maccascruff
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Good one!
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FamousGroupie
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Obsessive Saddo Fangirl
BAAAHAHAHAHAHA!! :lol:
I don't believe in Bondi. I don't believe in rugby league. I believe in Yoko, John Lennon, the Lost Weekend and me.
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SherryO
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:D :lol: :D :rofl: :rofl:
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theonlyfab4fan
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I AM THE BIGGEST JOHN FAN!
:D :D What everyone else said. Priceless Sandra. Thankyou for giving me a great laugh this evening.
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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ogoble
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:lol: LOL...funny stuff! I don't mind religious jokes unless they belittle God or Jesus. ;)
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ogoble
Jun 10 2006, 10:54 PM
:lol: LOL...funny stuff! I don't mind religious jokes unless they belittle God or Jesus. ;)

Same here! LOL
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ogoble
Jun 11 2006, 02:54 AM
:lol: LOL...funny stuff! I don't mind religious jokes unless they belittle God or Jesus. ;)

Or if they imply that Eve came first. :P

I'm teasing you, ((Olen)).
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wings4ever_vzla
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MaccaByrd
Jun 12 2006, 05:58 PM
ogoble
Jun 11 2006, 02:54 AM
:lol:  LOL...funny stuff!  I don't mind religious jokes unless they belittle God or Jesus.  ;)

Or if they imply that Eve came first. :P

I'm teasing you, ((Olen)).

i knew it, i knew eve was first..lol
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wings4ever_vzla
Jun 12 2006, 06:00 PM
i knew it, i knew eve was first..lol

^_^ I never liked the idea that woman was created out of some guy's spare rib but it doesn't matter much because I'm an agnostic heathen. :P ;)
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theonlyfab4fan
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I AM THE BIGGEST JOHN FAN!
MaccaByrd
Jun 12 2006, 05:58 PM
ogoble
Jun 11 2006, 02:54 AM
:lol:  LOL...funny stuff!  I don't mind religious jokes unless they belittle God or Jesus.  ;)

Or if they imply that Eve came first. :P

I'm teasing you, ((Olen)).

I highley doubt that Eve came first ......You know how quick men can be sometimes. :P
You say you want to save humanity but it`s people that you just can`t stand
John came to me in a dream and this is what he said. "I had a vision of a man on a flaming pie, and he told me that Betsy with a B not Lisa with a L is the biggest fan of mine". John trumps 'the boss' !

I WAS ROBBED BY THAT DEVIL WOMAN

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Sandra

theonlyfab4fan
Jun 12 2006, 06:16 PM
I highley doubt that Eve came first ......You know how quick men can be sometimes.  :P

:lol: :lol: Betsy
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Sandra
Jun 12 2006, 02:20 PM
theonlyfab4fan
Jun 12 2006, 06:16 PM
I highley doubt that Eve came first ......You know how quick men can be sometimes.  :P

:lol: :lol: Betsy

Yeah, but Eve faked it! :lol:
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