| What A Fool; [SD 31 ( 1 of 2)] | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jul 1 2008, 07:24 AM (105 Views) | |
| Tsalmavet | Jul 1 2008, 07:24 AM Post #1 |
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Dark Shadows
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I open my glass french doors, leading to the outside of my condo. The sun is bright, and the sounds are loud. New York City during rush hour, and I am able to capture the magic first hand. Horns, sirens, and screams of angry people are filling my head, like a marching band during a halftime show. The smell of New York City is always harsh, smog, and the smell of sour kraut is all I am able to take in. Almost enough to make anyone sick to their stomach, but not me. I have missed being home, I have missed the sounds, the smells, and the sights. "Ah, home at last!" Things here have changed a lot. Dory went back with family in Florida, all I have left is the voice mail she left me. It still plays in my head, "The lifestyle you live, is not one I can handle. I walked away from it years ago, and you are not ready to do that yet. Trenton will come and visit you throughout the summer, so you can still see your son." Damn, I have a tear in my eye playing it in my head. I never told anyone, my personal life went to hell, and I am sure by my actions. Everyone knew something was up. To keep them from knowing, I played the ass hole. I should always be cast for that role. I'm second to none, if I can steal a saying, when it comes to being one. However, the pain hits hard when I walk into my condo, and all that remains, is drawings on my fridge that my son left me. He'll be here this week, and he'll take the trip to Las Vegas with me. He wants to see his father wrestle, and his mom actually agreed to let it happen. The shame of fame has brought tears to my eyes, as I turn from the city, and walk back inside my condo. Shutting the doors behind me, I close the blinds to keep the bright sun at bay. The bottle of Crown sits on my coffee table, next to it, some old photos of Dory and myself, back when we first met. Standing back, I can only laugh, so young then, "God, it seems like only yesterday. I was a young prick trying to make his name known. I blink my eyes, and BOOM! Everything has evolved so much, I can barely close my eyes without fearing something else will change or disappear." I am use to losing things, my parents died at a young age, my brother wanted nothing to do with me for a long time, the Las Vegas Championship being ripped from my finger tips. And now, the mother of my child, basically hates me for what I do. "Funny how things change, but the theme is always the same. I do not believe the fame quote of, If you love something, let go, was compared to my life!" I laugh, shedding a tear, mostly from being drunk and letting the emotions out. I walk over to my black leather couch, flopping down into a depress position of sitting. The glass top table only reflects my sadden look of sorrow and despair. I can barely stand looking at myself. "What do you want? You think it's funny don't you?" Way too much to drink, and no one to tell me so. God, I hope I am not expecting an answer in return! I grab a picture of Trenton and myself, he's dressed like me, holding the Las Vegas Championship. The tear drops hit the table top, making small splashes. Now only if I had music playing, to set the depression into full swing! Oh no, here I go! "Well, my son turned ten just the other day. He said, thanks for the ball, dad. come on, lets play. Could you teach me to throw? I said, not today. I got a lot to do. He said, that's okay. and he walked away and he smiled and he said, you know, I'm gonna be like him, yeah. You know I'm gonna be like him." I grab the bottle of Crown from the coffee table, and hold it up in the air, "Here's to those two fucking criminals locked up in prison. Thanks for the contract, THANKS FOR THE CHANCE TO MAKE YOUR COMPANY BETTER! Yeah, well thanks for my new life, the life of a father who has nothing...Cheers MATES!" I down the as much of the bottle as I possibly could stand, before a burn hits into the throat, and the gag reflex kicks in. I sat the bottle down, and it's all black. Seven Hours Later I wake up on the floor of condo, my head is throbbing, and my eyes are blurry. The carpet smells like Crown Royal, as I try to clear my eyes so I can see. Trying to remember what happen, I rub my hands into my eyes, as I feel something, "Fuck, that hurts!" My hand is cut all up, and has blood stains on it. I look at the carpet, to see blood on it too. I pause, unsure of what has happen, but I do know I probably caused it! I slowly start to stand, as I stretch my arms and legs, from being on the hard floor. I yawn and start to walk, as the sound of glass crunching beneath me catches my attention. I look down, and I look to the left of me. The only thing left of the bottle is the bottom and the lid. Which explains the smell of the Crown on my carpet, but how did I break it? I look over at the table, and I see the answer, or the lack of what I see, gives the answer. My pictures are covered in shards of glass, suddenly, I recall what it was that caused the mess. The fact that I got no answer from my own reflection, set me off. I honestly think I just needed to break something, to relieve some of the stress I have been hiding. I'll call a cleaning service later, and have them clean the place. And I suddenly remember, Thursday I have my son, and Sunday, I face some random person at Showdown. I cannot let my son see me as a failure. For christ sakes, I just got out of prison over some bullshit. I pop my neck, and look at the picture of my son that is covered with glass. "No man should have to suffer the torment I have been through, You could lose your titles, you could lose your careers, and it would compare to nothing of my existence right now! I lived for two reason, and they are both in Florida. This sport has been all I have known. It brought some pathetic excuse of a loser off the streets, gave him a lifestyle he could be proud of, a house where he could sleep at, and food so he could eat. I can do nothing else outside of wrestling. What, should I run for governor? Maybe I could be teach a self defense class down at the Local Y! Would that bring my family back to me? No, she knows I live and breath this business. She knows my only desire is to be the center where I am. Unlike some, I am willing to risk my life to achieve that position. I almost gave my brother's life for it! Now, I gave my family for it...I never claimed to be all in, but somehow, I see all my chips in the center of the table. All I can do now is, hope that the cards I have in my hand is good enough to beat the others at the big roller's table. Otherwise, I'm going home with my head low and my pockets hanging out! I'll be damned if I lose everything at once! At Showdown, someone is going to get hurt. It does not matter who steps through the ropes and glares into my eyes. I am going to take away what you love most. You career, and if you have one, your title!" I reach down into the shards of glass, and pull out the picture of my son. With a few tears in my eyes, and a itch in my throat, I make a promise, "Son, I won't let you down!" With his picture in my hand, I head towards my white front door. I unlock the deadbolt and turn the knob. I look back at the mess, and open the door. I head out down the hallway with the door left wide open. Edited by Tsalmavet, Jul 1 2008, 07:25 AM.
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8:37 AM Jul 11