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*insert clever title here*; CD2V Rp 2 of 3
Topic Started: Jun 26 2008, 08:24 PM (286 Views)
TJ Raven
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sVo Champion
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//Open scene on another hot Nevada afternoon. The sun not quite breaking that 100 degree mark but it's still pretty hot out.

In what appears to be the backyard of a home we find TJ Raven and an unknown other person standing and talking with each other. Leaning against TJ's leg we see a metal STOP sign, behind the other guy, a stack of popcorn tubs We go in for a closer listen to what's going on.\\


TJ: Okay Listen V, This new fed isn't like I'm used to. Here they're ruthless, I've seen it from their main eventers and the main event guys aren't even hungry for a win, so I have, I HAVE to expect worse ten-fold from the undercard guys. So this is what I need you to do. I'm gonna tap you with the Stop sign, then I need you to smack me with the popcorn tub. Okay?

//TJ looks questioningly at the other guy who just kinda shrugs his shoulders before answering\\

V: But why a popcorn tub? Why not something more... I dunno... brutal maybe?

//TJ stops for a second and raises a finger to his chin like he's thinking\\

TJ: More brutal? Ya mean like a KFC bucket? Christ man, I'm just trying to train here not fucking kill myself!

You always were a little to extreme for you own good, and don't make light of the popcorn tubs. Those bastards cost me $20 bucks from Brendan theatres. I figure, eh just popcorn tubs so maybe I'll get a comp. Yeah right! I tell ya, when I went in and the way that the snack stand guy stared at me, I think he knew how dangerous what I was asking for was. It wouldn't have surprised me to have had to wait 3 days before I could pick up my order. I bet that kid never expected to go to work and have the adreneline rush of being an arms dealer on that day. I mean when you go to the movies and order popcorn it's one thing. But to just walk in and ask for 100 empty tubs. I bet they thought I was starting a militia. Wouldn't have surprised me a bit to have Good Morning America burst in and shove a camera in my face.


//V raises an eyebrow questioning TJ's rant\\

V: What the hell is Good Morning America?

//TJ is taken aback by V's ignorance\\

TJ: Geez, you live in a treehouse of something V. Go...

//V interrupts\\

V: Do I look like Steele?

TJ: Uhh... No. Listen, your resemblance or lack thereof to Skidmark isn't the point. But how can you NOT know what Good Morning America is? It's only like the greatest piece of Americana on TV! Tom Sawyer, remember him from those Mark Twain books?

V: Books?

TJ: Dude oh my God! TOM SAWYER! TOM FREAKING SAWYER?! Hello. Huck Finn? Injun Joe? Any of this ringing a bell?

V: //laughing\\ I like that cartoon.

//TJ looks confused\\

TJ: What cartoon?

V: Huck Finn. That's the blue dog that sings right?

TJ: //Obviously frustrated now\\ Are you serious?! Come on, you're fucking with me aren't you? That wasn't Huck Finn. That was Huckleberry Hound! Huck Finn ain't no Hanna Barbara shit!

V: Whatever man, he was still awesome.

♫Oh my darlin, oh my darlin, Oh my darlin Clem....♫


//TJ interrupts\\

TJ: Moo.

V: What?

TJ: Moo.

V: Moo? Are you trying to be funny?

TJ: Trying to be funny? Am I trying to be funny? Oh my God! NO! You are beyond help you know that?!

Listen. Tom Sawyer, his... I dunno, Mom maybe, or daughter, neice, something like that. She's the host.


//V looks at TJ with a look of confusion\\

TJ: And you used to listen to Howard Stern right?

V: Yeah. I still do.

TJ: Stil... Still DO! Are you on drugs?! Howard isn't on the radio anymore?

V: Uh yeah he is. Satellite radio.

//TJ rolls his eyes\\

TJ: Pfft, yeah. Satellite radio. How do you get satellite radio?! You driving a spaceship now?

V: No, actually it's a Chrysler.

TJ: Yeah and this Chrysler just gets radio emissions from outer space. Tell me V, what's the Top 10 on Mars?

V: Dude are you on drugs?

TJ: Am I on drugs? No, I'm not on drugs. Listen, That Sawyer woman, some relative to Tom, he's the host and that black woman from Howard Stern. Robin something, she's on there too. Fucks sake man!

//V rolls his eyes at TJ\\

V: And when exactly did this show go on the air?

TJ: I dunno the exact year but if my sources are right it originally started out as the sequel to that one movie, Good Morning Vietnam, with Robin Williams, but somewhere along the lines it got turned into a news show and no one seemed to notice. But that's all speculation.

V: Huh... so are you a fan of Seinfeld?

TJ: Jerry? Yeah he's okay I guess. Why?

V: Oh it's nothing. I was just curious.

TJ:Oh, Okay. So what were we talking about?

V: Eh... I don't remember. Nothing in particular I don't think.

TJ: Now look what you did. You got me all worked up over this whole deal with Tom Sawyer's old lady and that Stern woman that I forgot what the hell I was gonna say. Ya know what?

//TJ now totally fed up with this exchange with V just snaps, reaches down for the metal stop sign and blasts V across the face.

V remains unstaggered

Lowering the sign from V's face we see a small river of crimson has started to navigate it's way down the contours of V's face.

V realizing he's been busted open by TJ becomes enraged, and comes back with a brutal haymaker with one of the popcorn tubs.

TJ falls into the gravel on the ground clutching at his face amongst screams of pain and anguish as the scene fades to black\\


to be continued...
Edited by TJ Raven, Jun 26 2008, 08:55 PM.
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