Semi™

Jan 7 2007, 07:13 PM

[ADULT CONTENT]
Construction worker on the 5th floor of a building needed a handsaw. So he spots another worker on the ground floor and yells down to him, but he can't hear him. So the worker on the 5th floor tries sign language.

He pointed to his eye meaning "I", pointed to his knee meaning "need", then moved his hand back and forth in a hand saw motion. The man on the ground floor nods his head, pulls down his pants, whips out his chop and starts masturbating.

The worker on 5th floor gets so pissed off he runs down to the ground floor and says, "What the fuck is your problem!!! I said I needed a hand saw!".

The other guy says, "I knew that! I was just trying to tell you - I'm coming!"

Semi™

Nov 7 2006, 09:51 PM

Lets play Mommy and Daddy
A mother found her son scooping ice cream in the kitchen and was mad.

Mom : "Dinner is going to be ready in an hour, put that ice cream away and go play."

Son : "But mom, there's no one to play with."

Mom : "I'll play with you, what do you wanna play?"

Son : "Lets play mommy and daddy, you go upstairs and lay down on the bed."

The mom said ok and went upstairs. The son put on his dad's fishing hat and lit up one of his dad's cigarettes. He went upstairs and opened the door.

Mom : "Now what do I do?"

Son : "Get your ass out of bed, you whore, and fix that kid some fucking ice cream."

Semi™

Nov 8 2006, 04:12 PM

Bus Boy
A little boy got on a bus and sat behind the driver and said:
"If my dad was a bull and my mum was a cow I'd be a baby bull."
The bus driver scowled and told the kid to shut up.
But the kid went on with: "If my dad was an elephant and my mum was a girl elephant I would be a baby elephant."
The bus driver started to get angry but the boy carried on with other animals until the bus driver finally yelled at him and said: "What if your dad was a fucking drunk and your mum was a prostitute?"
"That's easy," said the boy. "I would be a bus driver."